BDSM by Wiki

This is just the definition that Wikipedia gives. I thought I would give another, outside and objective opinion and view to counteract my own to make things fair..

BDSM is a complex acronym derived from the terms bondage and discipline, dominance and submission, and sadism and masochism. BDSM includes a wide spectrum of activities and forms of interpersonal relationships. While not always overtly sexual in nature, the activities and relationships within a BDSM context are almost always eroticized by the participants in some fashion. Many of hese practices fall outside of commonly held social norms regarding sexuality and human relationships.

Many activities can be found under the umbrella of BDSM, which include- but are not limited to- forms of dominance, submission, discipline, punishment, bondage, sexual roleplaying, sexual fetishism, sadomasochism, and power exchange, as well as the full spectrum of mainstream personal and sexual interactions.

An important distinction is that BDSM is not a form of sexual abuse- although some BDSM activities may appear to be violent or coercive, such activities are conducted with the consent of all parties involved. BDSM relationships and practices are exercised under the philosophy of "safe, sane and consensual" (SSC), or the somewhat more persmissive philosophy of "risk-aware consensual kink" (RACK).

Activities and relationships within a BDSM context are characterized by the fact that the participants usually take on complementary, but unequal, roles. Typically, participants who are active- applying the activity or exercising control over others- are known as the Tops or Dominants. Those participants who are recipients of the activities, or who are controlled by their partners, are typically known as bottoms or submissives. Individuals who move between top/dominant roles and bottom/submissive roles- either periodically within a relationship, or from relationship to relationship- are known as Switches.

BDSM is often practiced within the context of a limited and defined encounter known as a BDSM scene. Such scenes often have ritualistic aspects complete with modes of behavior, forms of address, codes of conduct, dress codes, and many other aspects of theater and role playing. As such encounters are often- but not always- at least partly sexual in nature, people outside of BDSM have a tendency to view it as a form of "kinky sex".

Some participants incorporate aspects of BDSM into their everyday relationships with their partners, especially those who practice dominance and submission or power exchange (especially Total Power Exchange). For these individuals, BDSM is a part of their lifestyle and in some discussions is referred to as "The Lifestyle".

BDSM typically involves one partner voluntarily giving up control. The submissive partner gives control to the dominant partner in a ritualized interaction known as power exchange. The dominant partner is referred to as the "Dom", "Domme", "Dominant","Top","Master", or "Mistress and the submissive partner is called "sub","thrall","submissive","bottom","slave", or "pet".

BDSM actions often take place during a specific period of time agreed to by both parties, referred to as "play","a scene", or a "session". All parties involved usually derive pleasure from this, even though many of the practices that are performed, such as inflicting pain, humiliation or being restrained would be considered unpleasant under normal circumstances. Sexual intercourse, be it oral, anal, or vaginal, may occur within a session, but is not essential.

The fundamental principles for the exercise of BDSM require that it should be performed by mature and responsible partners, of their own volition, and in a safe way. Some BDSM practitioners prefer a code of behavior that differs from "SSC" and described as "Risk Aware Consensual Kink" (RACK), indicating a preference of a style in which the individual responsibility of the involved parties is emphasized more strongly, with each participant being responsible for his or her own well-being. RACK focuses primarily upon awareness and informed consent, rather than accepted safe practices. The consent and compliance for a sadomasochistic situation can be granted only by people who are able to judge the potential results. For their consent, they must have all relevant information at hand and the necessary mental capacity to judge. The resulting consent and understanding is often summarized in a "contract", an agreement of what can and cannot take place.

It must be possible for the partner to withdraw their consent at any time by using a safeword agreed upon in advance of the scene. Once used the Dominant stops whatever they are doing without question or hesitation and respects their partners limits. Without this there can be no trust and to ignore a safeword is the worst possible thing a Dominant can do in a scene even if they do not inflict any harm upon them. An entire Dominance and Submission relationship is based and valued on trust. Trust that the submissive's Dominant will take care of them and stop when they have reached their limits.

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